BJ does not mean Beijing to Americans

I went out with a few of friends last weekend. One of them is an ABC just like me. His name is Presley Wang. The other is from Beijing, a "real" Chinese. Her name is Liu Kou Shui.

We spent most of the evening going back and forth in discussions about the differences between real Chinese folks and ABCs. These discussions carried into emails during the week. Most of the email conversations were very typical until one sent by Liu Kou Shui to Presley took a turn for the comical. Here's the excerpt:

"...Presley, every Chinese, even ABC like yourself, should experience BJ at least once. Let me know when you go. I know BJ very well. I spent much time there. I can give you tips on what to do and where to go. I love BJ. It's a lot of fun. I miss it so much..."

Before this email, Presley and Liu Kou Shui were going back and forth about Beijing. But all the ABCs were speechless when they read this email. Apparently, BJ is the abbreviation that real Chinese and Beijingers use for BeiJing. It's now obvious that Liu Kou Shui is merely telling Presley that a trip to Beijing is worthwhile. That being said, I feel inclined to break some news to my real Chinese friends.

Dear Brother and Sisters from the Mainland, please take note. Really. Pay attention. BJ does not mean Beijing to Americans. It means BlowJob (Kou Jiao) to Americans.

Liu Kou Shui, poor girl, can you feel the blood rushing to your face? Do you now understand why Presley has been trying to ask you out on a date?

I really love my brothers and sisters from the Mainland. They sometimes are very cute.